Well, its over.and I'm back home. And yes, I'm glad to be back among familiar people and places. Yes, I wasted no time in quaffing a Coopers Pale, a Farmers Union low fat no added sugar iced coffee, a decent shiraz, and a pie with sauce. Nor did I delay making a fiery yet intricate beef curry any longer than was absolutely necessary. For the record, they were all unbelievably good. But I'm still trying to make some sense of what I have just done. I've just finished my fourth overseas biking adventure, and I have mixed feelings about it. Like the preceding three times, I do feel a sense of achievement, a sense of satisfaction that comes with dreaming up yet another unlikely motorcycle scenario, then actually carrying it out. The reality is that this is simply how I prefer to challenge myself these days. And as I write this, with the benefit of hindsight, I feel that on some days I made the grade, and some days I fell short. That to me is a matter of some regret, but this adventure was bloody hard going at times, as I knew it would be. Hence the challenge.
This kind of excursion is something that a lot of people tell me they would also like to do, but for one reason or another, they have not done. In that sense, I regard myself as lucky, because its a simple fact that not everybody is in a position to just go, no matter how much they might want to. Even the maxim that I picked up at a Horizons Unlimited rally sounds a little harsh in this context. " Those that want to will find a way, those that don't will find an excuse." I think this slogan is meant to motivate those that can, rather than judge those who can't. But hey, it worked for me.
But I also feel a bit flat. A lot of this has to do with jetlag and just being dog-tired. But there is a sense of regret, anti-climax even, because its over, and a sense of no longer having any focus. A sense of slight depression at having to face up to all the things that I was able to postpone, or not think about. A sense of guilt at my own self indulgence (I blame my Catholic upbringing for that one). A sense that nothing back here has changed. Well, why would it? Did I really expect it to? How can riding a motorcycle for 3 months change anything but my own outlook? It can't, of course. But to get home and pick up the 'Tiser and read that everybody is still sniping over how much water comes out of the Murray (a lot more than what goes in, apparently), that underwhelming twerp Jay what's his name is still the Premier, that The Power is still in crisis and is still getting hammered every week, that the usual bunch of embittered malcontents and would-be comedians are still writing those whinging, pointless letters to the Editor, all of these things just depress me even more. Then again, I still haven't heard one single syllable uttered by that painful Julia Bloody Gillard for the last 3.5 months, and for that I
am truly thankful.
This post adventure listlessness is inevitable, it's the price you pay for the joy of anticipation and the elation of leaving, and it usually lasts until I start planning for my next trip. But right now, I don't even want to think about that. And for the record, some things have changed. In my absence, Carolyn got a bit of work done on the house, and dealt with some nagging issues that I had been religiously avoiding for yonks. There goes the dough for my next trip, and here come more probing questions from the Accountant at tax time, but such is life. Good job,and thanks Darl.
Here are the vital statistics.
THE DURATION: 16 weeks.
THE ROUTE : Through twenty States of the US, and three Provinces of Canada, as per the above map.
THE DISTANCE: 15,079 miles or 24,126 km, all of it on the wrong side of the road, except for about 200 yards of sheer terror, when I really was on the wrong side of the road.
And now for a few not so vital statistics.
RIDING GEAR : I went through two pairs of gloves and a pair of riding boots, all BMW branded equipment, notice, which ultimately failed the test, and which had to be abandoned. In fairness, these items were not new when I started. My BMW Rainlock Suit performed admirably though. Here is what my riding jacket looked like after I unpacked it when I got home. Is that hard earned street cred, or what?
And here is what it looked like after soaking for a few hours in the bathtub.
I expect impending charges by the RSPCA. Probably aggravated assault causing actual bodily harm to an airport sniffer dog. Either that, or trafficking in a commercial quantity of dirt.
EQUIPMENT: I used two sets of tyres, a set of brake pads, one GPS which would not work at all, and which was replaced in North Carolina before I started, one GPS wiring harness, which shorted out in Alaska, probably due to being rained on continuously for a month. On the other hand, my Touratech dry bag did not let in a single drop of water, nor did my two smaller Ascend dry bags, nor my Touratech Zega Pro panniers, and they really copped some treatment.
A lot of people have asked me what the best parts were. This is not so easy to answer. Let's look at it this way.
HIGHLIGHTS.
- As if the opportunity to visit a lot of places and do a lot of things on the Bucket List wasn't reward enough, I really enjoyed being a fly on the wall, if you like. Meeting new people, seeing how they lived their lives, observing how they deal with issues on a daily basis, and trying to figure out where they are going collectively.
- Confronting the daunting US road system, learning how it works, and ultimately surviving it. At first, just being on the opposite side of the road with nobody to follow was scary enough.
- Buying the bike of choice, fitting it out, using it over a demanding itinerary with no major mishaps, failures or even a flat tyre, then being able to sell it was a testament to the value of careful planning. This would have been made much more difficult without the generous support of many people along the way. You know who you are, take a bow! And the internet.
- Learning to use a GPS was well worth the effort. Fantastic, mind boggling technology (as if the internet isn't enough to get your head around.) How long has that stuff been going on?
- Not getting sick, injured, mugged, robbed, seriously ripped off, shot or eaten. I regard these as a big plus.
- Meeting up with friends from Adelaide who were in the US on similar adventures. I crossed paths with Brian, Val, Bjoern and Sigrid in Asheville, North Carolina, at Mormon Lake, Arizona, and in Glennallen, Alaska. That was a great buzz, as we had got together several times back home to plan our respective journeys. It was all going pretty well until Bjoern had a big off and broke his arm!
- Meeting the legendary Ted Simon in person, and rapping with him about bike travel.
- Visiting the Boeing plant in Seattle. A totally awesome experience.
- Geographically, I don't want to say this was better than that. I selected my itinerary on the basis of those parts of the country I particularly wanted to see. But looking back over the itinerary, some of the standout moments were the Appalachian regions of North Carolina and Tennessee, with their great scenery and picture perfect small towns. I enjoyed the historic regions of Natchez, Mississippi, and of New Orleans, Louisiana. The spectacular Rockies of course, where I rode through several mountain passes lined with snow. The Beartooth Pass in the Montana/Wyoming border area was a standout. The magical National Parks of Utah and the awesome splendour and great bike roads of neighbouring Colorado. I recall my first encounter with buffalos in the Custer State Park of South Dakota, the quirky cowboy town of Cody, Wyoming, with its excellent Buffalo Bill Historical Center and nightly rodeos as being very memorable.
- Magical Yellowstone, where it was snowing when I arrived, was unforgettable. Steam pouring from geysers and buffalo alike! The wide open spaces, mountains and lakes of Montana made a big impression, as did the forests and rivers of British Columbia. The spectacular Fraser River Valley, then the vast Canadian prairies. The countless trees and unending greenery of the Yukon and Alaska, with their spectacular mountain backdrops, lakes and rivers. The maze of channels and islands of the Inside Passage, with totem poles, pods of orcas and majestic bald eagles on show. Historic Juneau, with its Russian heritage, and the gold rush era hotel where we stayed for a night. The eerie, misty Oregon coast with its clusters of sea stacks, the fantastic giant redwoods of Northern California, and the superb coastal roads were just motorcycle nirvana.
- Getting support and encouragement, and the occasional kick in the backside,which I probably deserved, from some of you. Thanks, guys.
LOWLIGHTS:
- The abysmal yet unseasonal weather in Canada and Alaska was a major downer. I fully expected to get wet, but the discomfort of riding in the rain for weeks at a time eventually just grinds you down. The extra concentration required over such along period was stressful and tiring. But ratcheting up the degree of difficulty also adds to the sense of achievement.
- Roger's bike packing up was a low point, but ultimately he was able to get back some dough, so it could have been a whole lot worse.
- The ultimate failure to get onto the Dalton Highway and reach Prudhoe Bay still
stings a bit. But it would have been a very tough and high risk ride in the
conditions, and by the time we got up to Fairbanks, I could not have cared
less, so I'll stick with the call I made. People have turned back within
50 yards of the summit of Everest. That has to feel worse.
- The severe turbulence I experienced in Arizona, Utah and a few other places was like nothing else I have encountered in years of riding, with the possible exception of the winds in Patagonia. This was very scary at the time. To be instantaneously flicked across double lines into the path of oncoming traffic is a health hazard. I felt I had no control and on a bike, that's very dangerous. This also caused me to change the itinerary, and miss out on some areas I was looking forward to seeing.
- The diet took a bit of a beating. I have no doubt that you can get whatever you want if you keep looking. I fell victim to convenience, and often ate what was closest. Then I frequently compensated by skipping a meal. Not good dietary practice at all. The things I missed most of all were decent breakfast cereal, good coffee and oddly enough, vegetables. I pined for a good old pub counter lunch more than once. But I still got out alive.
FURTHER OBSERVATIONS:
You know, one the worst things you can do is go somewhere, then complain because its not like where you live. We should celebrate difference (according to some people). So, I'm not complaining, I am observing, OK? And here are some of my observations, not in any particular order.
Fast Food. Anybody who has not visited the US may be unaware of what an all pervading monster the whole industry has evolved into. There are literally fast food joints everywhere. I can't recall seeing an empty one, anywhere. Yes, it really is fast, and yes, it really is cheap. I think at any given time, half the country is fully occupied feeding the other half. And rest assured, anything you buy will be loaded with fat, salt and sugar, the three major food groups. Serving portions are huge. Result? More fat people than you can poke a stick at. I heard an alarming statistic on TV that 35% of the US population is obese. Not fat, obese! When you see kids with pot bellies and more chins than a Chinese phone book, it really does ring alarm bells. Are their parents blind as well as stupid?? The answer is yes, by the way, and obese as well.
Plumbing. The number of tap permutations that have been developed just to get hot and cold water to come out of a shower head at the same time would boggle most Aussie brains. The number of times I said to myself "Mike, you're an Engineer, you can do this" would cast doubt on my credibility if I told you. And don't get me started on toilet flushing. In the States, its a form of entertainment.
Recycling. Here is something that really bothered me. I spent a lot of this trip staying in motels. Most include breakfast of some sort (but not as we know it!) Without exception, you always get disposable bowls, plates, cups and cutlery, usually made of plastic. Use it once, chuck it in the bin. It is demonstrably cheaper to make this stuff, use it once and bung it out than it is to pay somebody to wash regular utensils (or even stack them in a dishwasher) so they can be reused. The sheer volume of waste from this source alone, scaled up across the nation, is terrifying. I noticed very little encouragement for people to recycle anything.
Driving. Is the world running out of oil? Ever heard of global warming? The answer is obvious, but you'd never know it in the US. The 7 litre V8 is alive and well. The vehicle of choice appears to be the pickup truck. I saw one somewhere that actually had something in the tray at the back. Lots of house- sized RV's as well. How much gas these monsters chew up at 75 mph on the interstates or idling in traffic is scandalous. Anybody who drives something smaller and more fuel efficient is just asking to be laughed at, treated like crap out on the road, or to meet God if they have an accident. And anybody who walks must have a problem with their car.
Immigration. Its hard to tell where Mexico finishes and America starts, but the Mexicanos aren't the only ones who want in. Half the world is trying to get into the place. Maybe that frees up space somewhere else.
Service Culture. Like most Aussies, I hate tipping, but I'll do it if its deserved. And most of the time it is, because good service really is part of the culture. We could learn a lot from the US in this regard. I could go on. And I will. Drive-in banks are all over the place, so are ATMs, banks and post offices are open Saturdays, gas stations sell beer, supermarkets hardly ever shut. In lots of places, mailboxes are clustered together, and you have to go get your mail. (Not so good, that). You can buy almost anything on Amazon.com, and get it delivered the next day.
US Television. This observation is based on motel TV choices, maybe its
better at home. For a start, there are usually about 100 stations to
pick from. About 25% don't work properly, another 20% are in Spanish
(maybe they even pick up Mexican TV, I don't know). Several are just
advertising stuff, quite a few are nothing but hot gospelling by guys
wearing suits, not even the proper costumes, who purport to know exactly
what God wants us to do. As if they just left a confidential briefing with him.
Anything I watched was just by chance, more than anything else. I tended
to couch surf a lot, trying to find out what was going on, and rarely
found out anything. For a start, if it didn't happen in the US, it
didn't happen. Or if it really did happen somewhere else, it didn't
matter. Get the idea? I got sick of looking at re-worked babes with
cast- iron hair, super white teeth and voices like a dentist's drill
talking to each other and calling it news. There were numerous sports
channels, but I couldn't understand them either, especially when the
black guy was talking. And a weather forecast is about as easy to
understand as the concept of space-time. And that Anderson Cooper guy,
who elected him sheriff? Look, maybe its me. Lucky I had a blog to
write.
Professionals Advertising. One thing I did notice is that doctors are
allowed to advertise their services in the media. So are lawyers. And so
are pharmaceutical companies. For us Aussies, this is something really
different. Personally, I find it unseemly and a bit tacky. Like farting
on the bus. The lawyers are no surprise of course. Parasitic, ambulance chasing bastards
that they are. Have you been injured at work, or in a car crash, or did
you have problems after using this product, or better still, after
taking this prescription? We'll sue the drug company AND the doctor. No
win, no charge, of course. And no suggestion that anybody has done
anything wrong. Just lets fling some mud, and see what sticks. This is
like trial by ordeal, where the innocent have nothing to fear. How did it ever get like this? And how do we stop it before it gets here?
The pharmaceutical commercials are actually quite entertaining. Have you
got this or that? Well, take this! That takes about 3 seconds. The next
five minutes consists of just listening to the guy reading out all the possible side effects and contra indications, to keep the lawyers at bay. By this time, I had usually forgotten what the product was, in all but one case. That was cialis, aka viagra. When the reader gets to the part where he says gravely "and seek help for an erection lasting more than four hours", I'd just fall apart. Personally, I'd start worrying at three minutes, and call an ambulance after five. After two hours, I'd sell tickets.
SO WHAT?
I have had a pretty good look around a large chunk of the US. Most of the time I chose to avoid the big cities and get onto the roads less travelled, and into areas less populated. Huge megalopolises with millions of people running around like blue
arsed flies have no appeal to me, whatever continent they happen to be
on. I don't hesitate to say I found some wonderful areas, and I was warmly welcomed by many interesting and genuinely hospitable people. Most knew very little about Australia, and I think some were truly surprised that we had learned to walk on our two hind legs, let alone learn English. Hopefully now they know a little bit more.
Nevertheless, its hard not to conclude that America is starting to run into serious problems of its own making,
and becoming a victim of its own success. The sheer size of the
population is staggering. The sheer size of many of the big cities is
staggering. The pace is relentless and intimidating - 300 million people and they're all in a hurry (except Steve Linden, and the guys that make Jack Daniels). Bigger, higher, faster, more, more, more, now, now, now........Help!! Many
cities are dirty, noisy, unhealthy, and unsafe. In many places the air and water quality
are affected, and infrastructure is falling apart. At times, the very impressive looking road networks just grind to a stop
due to overload. Its a giant pressure cooker, I reckon. No wonder people go postal fairly regularly.
If that's what you want, great. I suspect a lot of people don't want it, but they're stuck with it. There's still a lot of room in Alaska though, but you really would have to be desperate. And the problems are only going to get bigger. Ultimately
you can't buy, build, spend or hustle your way out of not having enough land or
water, or irreparably damaging the ecology. And I'm not even going to mention crime, gun control, racial issues, and all that stuff. That kind of undercurrent is unsettling. I have to say it did make me appreciate living where I do, not that there aren't some parts of the US where I wouldn't mind living either.
So far the US has been pretty good at solving its problems one way or another. I hope they can address their current issues with the same success, because we are probably heading in the same direction. We should watch, and we should learn, because tomorrow's problems are always harder to solve than yesterday's. America has earned its place as the most powerful and influential country on the planet through more than 200 years of incredible achievement. It has faced down one threat after another to its existence and dominance, and has had its values tested many times over, and come out even stronger. Americans are justifiably proud of their great nation. Australia's history is quite different, and as a result we see things from a different perspective, but we still have a lot in common with America, and we share pretty much the same values. Even if we do talk kinda funny. But all things considered, I'm bloody glad we're on the same side.
Oh, and we visited Canada as well. Nice people, those Canadians.
There it is, friends. Another great trip, thanks for tagging along again. Farewell until next time, if there is to be a next time.
